Random Correspondences
TO: Father Time
Why do you always steal minutes from me on mornings and weekends then only give them back to me while I'm at work?
Why do you always steal minutes from me on mornings and weekends then only give them back to me while I'm at work?
TO: Kids living in my apartment building
The hallway isn't a race track. Putting your shoes on and clodding up and down the halls before school at 6:50am is not acceptable.
TO: Parents of kids living in my apartment building
When your kids stomp up and down the hallway at 6:50am in the morning, the INCORRECT reaction is: "Oh [insert child's name]! Please stop running in the hallway, please. People are trying to sleep, silly pants". CORRECT reaction is: "Quit running in that hallway or I'm going to cut your legs off" (followed by a big daily dose of Ritalin).
TO: Semi-trucks traveling on the highway during rush hour
Stay out of the express/fast lane. It's not for you. Basic science will tell you that your 20 billion ton truck will never be able to accelerate as quickly as my G5 in stop-and-go traffic.
TO: Young, hip 20-something guy at gas station this morning
Love the "Your Starbucks drink order embarrasses me" t-shirt you were wearing. Don't love the wedding ring you were also wearing.
posted by Erica at
9:44 AM
3 Comments:
ur funny... and umm, kids running in hallways, umm, that is not AT ALL my kids, no way. However, the correct response (well at least the one I give loudly) is I told you to stop it damn it, what the hell are you doing?! get inside. got to ur room. shut up.
and then they go outside later and throw rocks at random windows. You'd totally LOVE living in my apartment building. I'd send em over.
...and 20 something boys are stupid.
Oh you did moderation… good job. Only I don’t get the instant satisfaction of seeing my words in print. sigh.
Comment Moderation is off.
Bring on the instant satisfaction...
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